Setting Boundaries With Others During the Holiday Season by Scarlett Davanzo
Nov 21, 2023
With the holiday season quickly approaching, many people find themselves spending more time with loved ones. How do we set boundaries with others to make sure we are taking care of ourselves during the holiday season?
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Bring concerns up with your therapist. If you have concerns or feelings surrounding the holiday season, you may find it helpful to bring that into your therapy sessions. Your therapist can help you explore your feelings, offer support, and help guide you as you find ways to cope and manage throughout the holiday season.
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Opt out of conversations you don’t want to be involved in. If you know that time with family often brings up negative or uncomfortable conversations you can try to plan ahead and volunteer to do cooking, table setting, shopping, or other tasks that give you some separation from others. You can also remove yourself from a conversation by not giving commentary or moving into a different room.
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Set your limits beforehand. Many family members have different budgets and expectations surrounding holidays. If your family is planning activities or vacations that are out of your budget, be transparent. If you can’t get extra time off of work, be upfront. Communicating what you can and cannot do beforehand can help to avoid additional stress during the holidays.
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Communicate your feelings. Holidays are often times when family members ask for life updates on schooling, work, and relationships. Family members may also make unwanted comments on your appearance or weight. If this happens, you can communicate that you
don’t want to talk about those things over the holidays, and bring up something you do
want to talk about to change the subject.
5. Have a plan for after the holidays. Spending the holidays with loved ones can impact
everyone differently. Regardless of your family situation, make a self care plan for after the holidays to decompress, recharge, and do things that are affirming to your identities and needs.
